From “Happy Living! A Guide for Brides”

So, from what I understand, the garish tulips in the background are to distract and confuse your husband so much that he thinks you’re a catch, not some culinary dolt who believes putting a sprig of parsley in the center of this unattractive monstrosity of hard-boiled eggs mixed with a can of cream of mushroom soup (in a corned-beef crust, mind you) makes you the scientific-miracle love child of Betty Crocker and Julia Child.  Also, Happy Living! somehow thinks a recipe with the three main ingredients of hard-boiled eggs (the easiest thing to cook ever?), canned corn beef, and canned cream of mushroom soup doesn’t fall into the “can-opener method of cooking.”

I really hope that this meal in particular was served “on trays in the living room with soft background music.” Because nothing says “casual, romantic night at home” like eating a heaping, gloppy, grease-glistening slice of egg pie while listening to some late 70s Herb Alpert.

My mom was given this book for free at a department store when she registered for her wedding. Goodness help all brides from 1979.